Posted Tuesday, August 12, 2008 by
Laura Kassenbrock
“Failure is not an option.” Feels like I've lived my whole life by those words. But lately, I’ve begun to feel like it’s a flawed M.O., and I don’t think I’m alone.
I've mentioned before that I attended Butler University. It was my dream school. Busted my rear to get in there. Busted my rear, and sacrificed my physical well-being*, while there. When I graduated from Butler in May of 2006, our convocation speaker was James McBride. He’s the author of The Color of Water, a book that spent two years on the NY Times Bestseller list. Seems a guy that wouldn't know much about the topic of failure, eh? But that was exactly his point. McBride believed that fearing failure was, in itself, the ultimate failure, for if you feared what you didn’t know, you’d never push yourself to try the "impossible."
After graduation, my father came up to me, visibly irritated. “Who the hell encourages a room full of new graduates, and their parents who’ve scraped and sacraficed to educate them, to fail?!”
While my father may have** missed McBride's point, he articulates mine beautifully. Our whole lives we're taught that failing is bad. We play it safe because we're too afraid of what will happen if we step outside the lines to try what’s never been done before. But how are we rewarded? It seems that those people who do the “impossible” are the ones that reach their true potential, while the rule followers end up carrying out the dreams of others.
But as inspiring as pushing the envelope and risking everything is, sometimes we do fail. And it doesn't feel good. The inspiration for this post actually came from a blog post I recently read by Julie Wainwright. Wainwright was the CEO of Pets.com, the infamous company that suffered irreversibly after the dotcom bust. What's more, the very week Pets.com went belly-up, Wainwright's marriage of seven years did the same. She's had people laugh in her face upon introduction. She’s been called a loser and one of the biggest failures ever. On national media.
That's a hard burden to bear. But what her recent post and subsequent new venture smartnow.com, a Web site and community for women around 40, have taught me is that people can and do overcome mistakes and are often the better for it. Sure, feeling like a failure sucks. Failing sucks. But you know what sucks even worse than failing? The feeling of regret or what might have been. I can't say that I've been through something like Wainwright. I haven't even failed that much in my meager 24 years, but hearing the adversity that she overcame to become the woman she is today gives me the courage to say "Why not?"
There are of course times when failure is not an option*** but honestly, those times are few and far between. So I challenge you today to do something that scares the bejesus out of you, not with reckless abandon, but with a fearlessness and confidence that people will be given no choice but to respect. Chances are, you will learn something great, and if you fail, well, just remember, the opinions expressed (and advice given) by Laura Kassenbrock do not necessarily reflect those of Dittoe Public Relations.
* My average hours of sleep in college averaged five; the same as my average cups of coffee/day. And on many occasions, I swear I felt an ulcer coming on. I know, I know. "Cry me a river, private school girl."
** OK, definitely. Love you, dad.
*** Bungee jumping, drug testing, defusing bombs (who are you, MacGyver?)